FEATURED INSEASONMOM-JUNE 2012-LENORA BREDER


Lenora with Gabriel

Name:                     Lenora Breder
Age:                        49                                                      
Residency:             Greenville, Rhode Island
Children:                Isabella (11), Gabriel (10 months)
Married:                 Eric Breder (38)
Profession:             Legal Assistant

“At the age of 36, Eric (age 25) and I were married on August 29, 1998.  He was 11 years younger.  And yes, I was a cougar before the term “cougar” was popular.  Who knew I’d start a trend!”     Lenora Breder








InSeason Mom: Tell us about your conception and pregnancy.

Lenora: Two years after Eric and I were married, we decided to start trying to get pregnant.  Because my cycles (ovulation) were never regular, I just picked a point in the month we started trying.  I got pregnant on the first try (at the age of 38) and Isabella was born on January 31, 2001.  

We decided to add to our family two years after Isabella was born but was unsuccessful.  I was able to get pregnant 5 times but all ended in miscarriages.  I could get pregnant but couldn’t stay pregnant.  I would lose the babies anywhere from 7-9 weeks. 

One week I’d hear a heartbeat and the next, nothing.  After the fifth time, we decided that we were not going to try any more.  We felt that we were blessed with a very healthy baby and left it at that.

Fast forward 10 ½ years (January 12, 2011) and I find out that I am pregnant AT THE AGE OF 49.  I was in disbelief and actually thought I was going through menopause.  I think I was in denial at first and my husband couldn’t believe it.  When my doctor’s office suggested that I go for a blood test to make sure I wasn’t pregnant, I laughed at them and said it was not possible.  They insisted and off I went.  The doctors called me the next day (January 12th – which is my birthday) and confirmed that I was indeed pregnant.  They said my numbers were very, very high and that I needed to go to my doctor’s office immediately.

They ran a sonogram and it showed in fact a blip.  That blip was my baby.  My doctor that said the chances of a woman my age, not using fertility to get pregnant and not have multiples was nil.  I was her oldest non-fertility patient to get pregnant. 

I thought that because of my age that I would be considered “high risk.”  But no, I was scheduled to see the doctor once a month.  For some reason this pregnancy was textbook.  Everything was perfect and all the tests were right on target.  I had the best pregnancy (as I did with my daughter years before).  I felt great and looked great too.

SUPPORT

InSeason Mom: How supportive were your doctors during your pregnancy?

Lenora: My doctor and Holly, my sonogram tech, were very supported and almost as excited as my husband and I were (once we got out of our denial stage) that we were having a baby.  I don’t think that I could have had more support from any other doctor or practice.  They were there 100% all the way until I delivered my son, Gabriel.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS

InSeason Mom: What was the reaction of friends and family when you told them about your pregnancy?

Lenora: My husband is very helpful and a great dad.  My family, particularly my mother was in shock.  She was very, very concerned about me because of my age and her imagination was going crazy.  I finally had to let her know that I was healthy and that everything would be ok.  She finally came around.  The rest of my family and extended family were very excited (and shocked) but also worried about me.

My friends were equally excited and very happy.  I think that they were glad that it was happening to me and not them.  They were very much on board and, still to this day, suggest that we have another baby so that Gabriel will have a sibling close in age.  I told them that I didn’t want to be 50 and pregnant.  My friends are very helpful as well and always there if I need their assistance.

LABOR AND DELIVERY

InSeason Mom: Did you take any childbirth classes? Why or why not?      

Lenora: I did not take any childbirth classes.  I figured I did it once and I remembered what to do.

InSeason Mom: Where did you give birth and what do you remember most about the birth experience?

Lenora:  My labor was a month early.  Gabriel was due on August 23, 2011 but decided to join the world on July 23, 2011.  I think the reason for that was that the week before (exactly to the day/hour) we were on a family vacation in the Outer Banks.  We decided to all to Kitty Hawk to see the Wright Brothers Memorial and infamous Sand Dunes.  At 8 months pregnant, I climbed two of the huge Sand Dunes.  I couldn’t make the third.  I was getting very hot and tired.  I think that I “pre-heated” the oven and that’s why Gabriel arrived a month early.  That’s just my thought anyway.

 My water broke (it never broke when I had my daughter) at around 4:30 a.m. and I shot out of bed like a bullet.  My husband usually leaves for work at 4:00 a.m. but this particular day he was going into work later.  I called my doctor’s office and she said to get to the hospital.  I arrived at Women and Infants (Providence, RI) at 6:30 a.m. (had to take a shower and all).

They signed me in and sent us up to the labor/delivery room.  By the time I got to the room it was around 7:15/7:30 a.m.  I was just watching TV with my husband.  My contractions were there but really weren’t affecting me.  My contractions stayed the same until about 12:30 p.m.  They became stronger but I was still able to manage through them.  I was on Facebook and texting family and friends about what was going on.  

At 1:30, the doctor/nurses wanted to know if I wanted an epidural.  I had decided to get one but wanted to wait a little longer.  Around 2:00 the contractions were getting stronger but I was still able to deal with them.  I decided that this was a good time to get the epidural because if the contractions got too intense I wouldn’t be able to be still for the anesthesiologist.  

I had the epidural at 2:30 and Gabriel was born at 3:42 p.m. on July 23, 2011.  He came into the world at 4 pounds 1 ounce.  He was perfectly healthy, breathing on his own and eating.  Because of his weight they wanted to keep him in the NICU for a while.  He proved that he was able to continue to breathe on his own, sleep in a crib in the open environment and gain weight.  After a week, he left the hospital weighing 4 pounds 5 ounces.

 My post-delivery was perfect.  I felt good and was up and walking around on the second day.  I visited the NICU every day from 11:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m. so that I could visit and feed Gabriel.  My husband would stop by the hospital on his way home from work (around 9:30 p.m.) and do the night feeding.
  
I AM MOM

InSeason Mom: What concerns do you have about being an older mom and how do you overcome your concerns?

What concerns me about being a mom (again) at the age of 49 is that I hope to be around for a very long time to see him grow up, graduate and get married and have children.  Other than that I really don’t have any major concerns.  Yes, I’m older but I think that I know more and don’t let the little stuff bother me.  I also have my daughter, Isabella, who is a very big help and loves her brother very much.  I just take everything in stride.  Of course there are days where I don’t know which way I’m going but I figure “that’s life” and deal with it.

 InSeasonMom: What do you enjoy about being an older mom and how has it changed you?

 Lenora: What I enjoy about being an older mom is that I get to do it all over again.  Yes, that sounds like I should be running for the hills but I loved when my daughter was born and watched her grow up. 

 I think that I can multi-task even more as an older mom.  I also think that having an infant will keep you young or, at least, on your toes.

As I work full time, my day is long and exhausting but very much worth it.  I can’t wait to get home and see my kids.

InSeasonMom: What advice do you have for women considering motherhood after 35?

Lenora: I say go for it.  As long as you are healthy and you have no underlying health factors and up for the biggest (but worthwhile) challenge, your life will only better.  There are many people who will voice their concerns about what can go wrong if you are pregnant over 35.  But think of the reward if you do find yourself pregnant.  You will have this baby that was created out of love and what better reward is that.  Today, being pregnant over 35, and even over 45, is no reason to be alarmed.  With all the modern medical advancement we have, there is no reason not to have a child.

InSeasonMomCynthia would like to thank Lenora for being an inspiration to moms across the world!  (Featured InSeason Mom monthly series started in 2006 and resurrected again in 2011) Check out previous featured InSeason Moms on this blog or on http://www.inseasonmom.org/FeaturedMom.html


7 comments:

  1. What an inspiring woman. Taking it all in her stride at 49. Loved reading this.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thanks for your comment. Lenora's story is inspiring.

    ReplyDelete
  3. so interesting and inspiring!! thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Annmarie, thanks for taking time to comment. I appreciate that.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hello Cynthia, I've missed reading your blog! May and June were so busy with "ending" activities. I'm sure you've heard that the older your kids get, the busier you get. It's hard to comprehend that when they are little.

    I enjoyed your story, Lenora, and wish you a continued blessed life with your husband and children.

    49 - Wow! Hey, but you're proof that it can be done. :)

    I will be back later, Cynthia, to catch up on previous posts.

    ReplyDelete
  6. You mean my kids are going to become even busier than they are now!

    Anita, I always look forward to your comments. It means so much to me when you take time from your busy schedule to post...thanks and blessings to you.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes they are! Sleepovers, study groups, the pool, volunteering, church field trips, school clubs, after school practices, before school practices, more shopping, blah, blah, blah... but you know that, right? LOL And they can't drive!

      I receive the blessings. Blessings to you too. :)

      Delete